{Why I'm scared to have a 2nd baby}

Let me preface this by saying that I absolutely loved being pregnant. Like every single second of it. Even the nausea. It was probably the only time I  have ever welcomed nausea because, well, it meant that I was pregnant. And every mother I ever talked to told me that nausea meant the baby was healthy.

I had a fairly healthy pregnancy. Then around 27/28 weeks my doctor realized my belly was measuring bigger and my uterus was measuring higher than it should have been. So he sent me for a sonogram. And just as he suspected...my amniotic fluids were measuring high. In medical terms I was borderline Polyhydramnios. 

Polyhydramnios (polyhydramnion, hydramnios, polyhydramnios) is a medical condition describing an excess of amniotic fluid in the amniotic sac. It is seen in about 1% of pregnancies,^[1][2][3]. It is typically diagnosed when the amniotic fluid index (AFI) is greater than 24 cm

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My fluids were at a 21.5 which put me in that borderline range. What did this mean? That my doctor would have to monitor my amniotic fluids by way of a sonogram and NST {Non Stress Test} every week until my levels showed to level. {which they never did} When I was initially told all this I kind of freaked. If my fluids continued to increase the risks were almost too much to bear...

Premature rupture of the membranes

Placental abruption

Preterm labor and delivery

Growth restriction

Stillbirth

C-section delivery
Postpartum hemorrhage

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A little hard to swallow, right? I knew the only way I was going to get through this was by prayer and divine intervention from God! So, I asked for prayer from my friends and family. And it must have worked...because I never really worried anymore and my levels never increased. They didn't decrease either, but not increasing was more important. Plus, I had the most active little boy growing inside of me that reminded me daily that everything was fine and God was in control. God sent this peace over me and I knew that it was all going to be okay. Plus, it was kind of nice getting to see my sweet boy on sonogram every single week.   Besides the fluid levels, the rest of my pregnancy was pretty close to perfect. Until Tuesday, May 25th. The day I delivered Mason. My doctor sent me over to be induced, but I was already in labor. And my blood pressure spiked. At 40w4d I developed toxemia. Thankfully, everything went just fine {besides the devil drug - magnesium sulfate}.   So now I have those two things on my chart - Borderline Polyhydramnios and Toxemia.
And now that it's all over and I look back on it...those two things terrify the heck out of me if we were ever to get pregnant again. Yes, I know that God is in control, just being honest here. I'm scared! We were so blessed the first time around that these two things did not develop into anything more.      

Sonogram of Mason at the time I learned about the fluids

My sweet/healthy boy now